Vytautas Mineral Water – It’s Earth’s Juice!
It’s really pretty difficult to make a good advertisement for H2O. We’ve seen the purity of the “natural, mountain sources” almost as often as we’ve seen the lips of models break into smiles as they’re refreshed by a bottle of stolen Fijian resources. But the most limited of resources seemed to be marketing ideas for the world’s most ubiquitous commodity … UNTIL NOW!
This ad for Vytautas Lithuanian mineral water oversells the crap out of water. Literally. It tells you their water is “poop-less,” unmarred by fish or bird feces, squeezed directly from Earth itself, so enriched with sparkling, pure minerals that it will allow consumers to digest leather coats and sandwiches made from iPads! This water is so hilariously in-your-face that by the end of the ad all I wanted to do was joke about wild animals in space and YELL. OUT. EVERYTHING!!! (In the fashion of the insane narrator). AND I DIIIID!!! ALL! DAY! This was the most viral ad of the week and, according to AdWeek, was the brainchild of some silly genius university students. Lithuania FTW.
Zoo York – Kate Upton Takes Zoo York
This is officially the last time I will write about Kate Upton (I hope). If you have somehow avoided her boobs until now, she is this year’s Sport’s Illustrated Swimsuit Edition covergirl, she’s done a series of Carl’s Jr. spots that make you hungry for much more than a burger, and this week her boobs went viral yet again in this Zoo York ad for … clothes or something?
A couple of gnarly cockroaches are chatting on the dumpster (sounds like the beginning of a good joke). One is talking about the approaching skateboards (oh, that’s right, there were skateboards in the ad! Maybe it’s for skate gear?) and the other is transfixed on, you guessed it, Kate Upton’s boobs.
They think they’re talking about the same thing until the dirtier of the two is so distracted he gets crushed by a skate trick. The foul-mouthed cockroaches got the ad banned from prime-time TV which, of course, significantly upped its online shares. It was a clever commercial for something-or-other but with that being said, I’m ready for a new it-girl any day now … Like maybe one who speaks?
Old Navy – Best T Infomercial
This ad for Old Navy’s new t-shirt line ‘Best Tees’ takes the infomercial format to hilariously hyperbolic new heights. It’s also surprisingly effective at selling the product. Like, I want one … Now.
First they got the “best T ever: Mr. T” (a.k.a B.A. Baracus, a.k.a How does this guy go out in public? a.k.a. Mr. T will do your commercial too) to sell t-shirts and make bad puns with all the intensity he once used to mangle bad guys. Then comes comedian/actress Anna Faris to demonstrate how Old Navy’s Best T’s have changed her from a “dillweed” to a cake-and-meat making sweetheart. While the jokes are definitely cheesy, they are also plentiful and perfectly-timed to make this ad so over the top that it is actually pretty darn funny.
On top of all that, you’ve got an infomercial-simple product that everyone wants but that really is a headache to buy (not that my shirts get caught in drawers or anything) and Old Navy does an excellent job selling us on theirs.
Red Bull – Jesus
Getting a commercial banned from television is a pretty fail-proof viral mechanism, but the verdict is still out on blasphemy as a selling technique. Red Bull, thanks to their ‘our-sugar-juice “gives you wings” motto, is no stranger to walking to biblical line in their ads. It was only a matter of time before they crossed it (pun intended). This ad is another one of their low-budget cartoons which features a bored Jesus out on a boat fishing with some plebes or prophets or something. You’d think it’s the Red Bull that enables Jesus to step out of the boat and flit across the water, but you’d be wrong. Jesus doesn’t need Red Bull. “It’s no miracle,” says cartoon Jesus, “you just have to know where the stepping stones are.” Ouch.
Meant for South African viewers, the ad has gotten plenty of free international press as well as international upheaval from Christian and Muslim organizations. Only Red Bull can decide if the controversy and public apology are worth it, but in the world of capitalism, there is only one faith and that’s marketing. View counts will be the judge.
CDC (Center for Disease Control & Prevention) – Tips From Former Smokers
Amid the spoofs and boobs on the Internet this week was one serious and sad string of anti-smoking PSAs from the CDC. Each spot features one former smokers message: a mother and her asthma-riddled child, a cancer patient getting ready in the morning, a father after a heart-attack. They don’t point to big tobacco companies, they don’t claim to be victims. They very simply lay out the reality they now live in because of their decisions and they give the viewer suggestions to avoid making their same mistakes.
The anthem ad features a handfull of ex-smokers doing every-day tasks like showering, shaving, gardening, shopping and painting the house except that each of them has a surgical stoma implant in their necks that they have to use to breathe and speak. Now, when performing every-day tasks, they also have to avoid getting water in their throat or having food come back up and they give these glimpses into their life as tips to viewers who may or may not be headed in the same direction. Because of their condition, most of us don’t often encounter stoma users in our own every day lives and so seeing them in theirs makes for a very effective reality check.